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Members (810)



Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

A. He wanted cold hard cash!


Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

A. "Is that you mommy?"


Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

A. Frostbite.


Q. How do crazy people go through the forest?

A. They take the psycho path.


Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?

A. Cell phones.


Q. What do you get from a pampered cow?

A. Spoiled milk.


Q. Where do polar bears vote?

A. The North Poll


Q. What did Geronimo say when he jumped out of the airplane?

A. ME!!!


Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?

A. In snow banks.


Q. Whats brown and sticky?

A. A stick.


Q. Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?

A. Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!


Q. What dog keeps the best time?

A. A watch dog.


Q. Why did the tomato turn red?

A. It saw the salad dressing!


Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?

A. It let out a little wine!


Q. How do you make a tissue dance?

A. Put a little boogey in it!


Q. Where do bees go to the bathroom?

A. At the BP station!


Q. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

A. Odor in the court.


Q. What did the water say to the boat?

A. Nothing, it just waved.


Q. What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?

A. Dam!


Q. Why dont skeletons fight each other

A. They dont have the guts.


1. knock knock

   whos there?

  its me

its me who?

its me dont you recognize  me? 

2. knock knock

whos there?

canoe

canoe who?

canoe open the door?its cold outside.

3. knock knock

whos there?

cows go

cows go who?

no they dont cows go moo not who.

4.knock knock

whos there?

radior

radior who?

radior[ready or] not here i come.

5.what is the loudest pet?

 trumpet

6.which is the gate you cant enter?

Colgate

7.which is the hottest day?

sunday

8.what do you eat in a beach?

sandwhich

 9.what is the dress you cant wear?

adress

 10.what belongs to you but is used mainly be others?

your name

What feature do witches love having on their computers?
A spell checker

Where do skeletons swim?
The Dead Sea

What do mermaids have on toast?
Mermalade

which  country has the most germs?

germany

why are adults always complaining?

because they are groan ups

what kind of bees are always complaining?

grumble bees

why did the boy take a pencil to bed?

he wanted to draw the curtains

why did the boy throw the butter?

he wanted to see a butter fly

teacher:"your daughters only 5 and she can spell her name backwards?that´s, incredible"

mother:´yes,we are very proud of her"

teacher:"what´s her name?"

mother:´Anna"

´what are 3 words most used by students" the teacher asked the student

´I don´t know" says the student

"that´s corect´ said teacher.

shane: Dad,today my teacher yelled at me for something I didn´t do

dad:´what did she yell at you for?"

Shane:"for not doing my homework

dad can you wrte in the dark?

yes

good,can you sign my report card in the dark,please?

dad I´s been expelled

what? i spent so much money on sending you to school and you still say I´s" ´.

what would you get if you crossed a vampire with a teacher?

lots of blood tests

history teacher:what was Camelot?

where Camels were parked

history teacher:lets learn about British kings and queens.who came after Mary?

student:her little lamb

why dis the teacher wear sunglasses?

because his students were so bright

teacher would you punish someone for someting they didn´t do/

of course not

good.i didn´t do my homework.





 
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